Undies, Britches and Gluteus Maximus Galore!

I walk up the sidewalk towards school, not the most cheerful of places, but for some reason, I’m in a good mood today so I could care less. My toast didn’t land butter-side down when I woke up and I had enough money to stop at the gas station on the corner for a cup joe. The sun is up early, shining bright rays onto my face and the temperature is just right. I let out a content sigh as I open the door and parade into school with my fellow students. But there, bending over in front of me, is the most horrid and atrocious scene. A student, someone I don’t know, has dropped their agenda in the hallway and leaned down to pick it up, revealing to me and almost half of the school population their ghastly (although not entirely) unmentionables.

I was outraged! Not only had my perfect and seemingly pleasant day been completely demolished, but I was left with this terrifying image in my head. I left the location of the accident, somewhat dazed, and sauntered off to my class. Instead of focusing on my class work, I sat there, staring aimlessly into space, wondering why on earth someone enjoys flashing their undies to the whole entire school.

Honestly guys, if you’re going to flash someone you’re underpants, why do you act angry when someone says something about it? That’s like chewing up your food and spitting it out on the table and getting upset when your friends abandon you. Gross right? 

And it can’t be too comfortable. Guys are forced to waddle around the school like a pregnant woman to keep their pants at least strapped to their legs. I understand that girls sometimes go to extreme measures to spice up their look, but really guys, are you that into wearing your pants below your knees in order to look “sexy?”

So next time you feel like letting your pants sag way below your underwear, maybe consider that you might be ruining someone’s day and disrespecting not only yourself, but the school as a whole. Have some pride, boys. And for the last time, pull up your pants!